Bunk beds are not as awesome when you're a grown-up

When you're five, bunk beds are awesome. They pretty much guarantee you a spot at the cool-kid table. And they're a status symbol - especially if you're on the top bunk. Even at ten, at fourteen a bunk-bed is the coolest bed (short of a hammock or living with wolves) you could ever hope for.

At 23, not so much.

 For one thing, the bunk bed that's been around since you were a kid has gotten creaky. So when you come home at 2am after a night out it's impossible to quietly drift off - you wake up the other person in the bunk bed: your 21-year-old sister, who happens to have the bottom bunk.

And it's not ideal to bring friends home... or a man friend...

 ("Want to come back to my place? I have a really sweet bunk bed...")

 And sometimes you have to deal with ladder malfunctions. (coming up next)

So I live in a bunk bed. I could move out. I could get a normal grown-up person apartment... but........

The growing Sharknado threat

by johnmnelson.
Explore more infographics like this one on the web's largest information design community - Visually.

Film studio The Asylum has been warning us for years of the growing threat, and only now in a time of global crisis when hurricanes, tornadoes, and earthquakes are in the news daily have scientists taken heed.

The graphic above is a result of years and thousands of hours of manpower researching global weather trends and the possibility of hurricane-tornado updrafts resulting in the transfer of marine life to coastal land areas.

Scientists have warned of the cataclysmic results of global warming and climate change; thus, the growing threat of the Sharknado:







And while we're at it, let's not forget Asylum's other cautionary tale, Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus.

Bees are jerks

I'm laying awake now reflecting on my three swollen, stinging welts and the conclusion is this: bees are jerks.

They make hives in weird places and get freaked out at the slightest deviation in their routine. In some ways they're even worse than rattle snakes: rattlers don't strike unless bothered, and at least it's all over soon after that. But bees are the aggressive kamikazes of the insect world and they'll get macho right up in your grill if you're within smelling distance, much less stinging distance.

I was out in the backyard watering the plants when I tugged the hose around a corner to the side of the house and it strained around a wooden railroad tie-style barrier. That happened to be the home of some seriously jerky bees.

As I was watering ten feet away I felt a stabbing pain in my left hand, on my thigh; two yellow jackets attached themselves there.

As I screamed and waggled away in my floral capris, dress short, and blazer, I realized I was being stung.

Worse, bees were stuck flying around between my shirt and blazer so I scrambled into the house tearing off my clothes.

And as my dad told me to run cold water over my hand... I felt something in my hair.

There were bees in my hair.

Those jerks were in my hair!

I tore not one, not two, but three yellow jackets out of my scalp before my dad administered the Wild West bee sting cure-all: baking soda paste, and liquor.

So now, after icing my wounds, applying baking soda, and drinking carefully prescribed glasses of Rioja, I'm sitting up in bed just thinking about how I will take my revenge.

Because bees are huge jerks. Are they as bad as mosquitoes? No, but they're still jerks.

This educational moment of the day brought to you by the Sarcastic Fringehead

The Sarcastic Fringehead has got to be one of the strangest and most entertaining fishes I have seen in a long time; they look like short, big-mouthed eels and live in abandoned turban snail shells. The fish are very territorial and try to scare off rivals by out-fabulousing each other, waving their neck-fringe around to get the best shell. So next time you need a weird fact to break the ice at a party, or you just want to sound smart - remember the Sarcastic Fringehead.

I'm not a Benghazi conspiracy theorist but I am going to read the newly released documents

I'm not saying there's more of a scandal to find in the newly released emails and notes on Benghazi, but I think it's important to read and form your own opinion.

You can read the full documents, embedded below:

White House Benghazi Emails

Free wisdom scattered around downtown Seattle

An anonymous do-gooder is trying to inspire chilly Seattleites with signs posted around town.

Someone is spreading some free wisdom around Seattle, piggybacking on No Parking sandwich boards on Westlake Avenue and in the Denny Triangle.

I first noticed the signs, made from big pieces of plain cardboard, in midwinter and started seeing them pop up near construction sites and intersections with city signboards. The author changes them out when they wear out or get moved, but throughout the city the messages are much the same: forgive; do good; be kind; be happy.

I tried to find out who was responsible by asking around and leaving my card on the signs, but they remain anonymous. I guess I'll just have to wonder and smile every time I see these signs.

Spotted: free wisdom on top of an old No Parking sign on Westlake Ave outside the South Lake Union Goodwill.

A mysterious person quotes Ralph Waldo Emerson to inspire Seattleites to do some good in everyday life.

In the Denny Triangle: Reminding us to be kind every day.